spring break. day 1. 9:58 am

i want to preface this post by saying i love my children and kurt so much and i know they are the most wonderful gifts and blessings from God. i know most of you know i feel this way and think i'm a good mom. (boy do i have some of you fooled! ;) ) i'm so thankful when you let me know that, even if a lot of the time i don't feel like it's true.

yesterday was a near perfect day. it was my turn to sleep in, kurt got krispy kreme and starbucks for us, wilson and i had a wonderful bonding time while the girls and kurt were at church (we try to take turns - wilson can't handle church yet). the girls had a wonderful time playing with the neighbors outside after church and i got a little cleaning in while watching the cubs win. after that our sweet wonderful babysitter came and kurt and i got to go out to dinner and did a little shopping. then i got to put the girls to bed and snuggle. ella and i had a sweet chat and then i played with her hair a little as she fell asleep. then anna and i crawled in her bed and read american girl books until way too late in the evening. kurt came in to check on us and had a huge grin when he saw us both there with our noses in our books. after we finished the books we were reading at nearly the same time anna rolled over and was almost sound asleep in my arms before i snuck a kiss and stole away. it was just a wondful day.

fast forward to 3 am. ella is in our bed with her feet digging in me and i can't sleep. we had turned the furnace off and forgot to turn it back on, and it was COLD! i fell asleep debating whether or not to turn on the furnace, so we all woke up a little too early since we were freezing. this, of course has already led to the grumpies. we receive a text from our cousins saying they are coming to visit tomorrow morning. great news!!! but no, anna cries because they aren't coming for the whole entire week. 5 minutes later (so about 8:30 am) the girls decide they want to go play outside. so e puts on her sundress and silver glitter flats and starts to head out. did i mention it's COLD? i mean like 30 degrees. so the battle ensues and lasts for at least half an hour, in which time anna gets dressed and proceeds to start in with the same argument. apparently if you are playing basketball you are immune to any kind of coldness known to man. she gets her basketball out, which is of course flat because of the cold. i have to go out to get the pump and as i go wilson starts screaming and throwing a fit because 1, he can't be more than 3 feet from me without doing that, and 2, he wants more than anything to go outside even though it's 30 degrees and he's still in his pajamas. so i slip out with him on my heels and anna on his, and he manages to get the door open and smashes his little fingers in it. i can't find the air pump. so now anna's mad and wilson's screaming. i get ice on wilson's fingers and everyone settled down and think maybe i can sneak up for a shower while they watch monsters inc because anna wants to go to target to see if they have doll clothes and we need food for dinner.

i get in the shower as fast as i can, but as i am washing my face wilson bursts in, excited to have found me, and proceeds to flush the toilet, causing scalding hot water to come out of the shower head. i of course get soap in my eye and can't see and am jumping around to keep out of the steaming hot water's way. wilson worries or probably more likely is just curious and starts opening the shower doors to see what's going on. i have no choice but to block the water with my body so he won't get sprayed. i yell for anna which scares the poor guy, but she is now so caught up in the movie (that she's seen at least 50 times) that she wouldn't be moved by anything short of an earthquake. finally the toilet stops running, but wilson thinks that must not be right so he goes to flush it again. i rinse off as best as i can before the next hot shot and try to get dressed. although this too is a challenge because wilson is holding on to one of my legs and i'm trying to stuff my other leg into jeans that don't fit because the only pair that does fit now since i've gained so much weight is in the laundry. so as i'm standing half naked, with jeans on one leg and wilson on the other the girls come up crying because ella said anna's american girl has poop in her pants and ella won't apologize. i smooth things over, assuring anna that molly does not have poopy pants (not a conversation i ever dreamed i would have), hand wilson off to anna, finished getting dressed and sit down to email kurt and ask where the basketball pump is. and i think to myself i had better write this down.

i almost always try to look at the bright side of life, and i imagine someday i will look back at this and laugh. i do know ignoring the little bumps and embracing the bright spots is the only way to live. but in those 2 minutes alone in the shower i got to thinking about how even though know wilson is so clingy i'm going to have such a hard time sending him to school. even just having him grow out of this huggy, lovey stage will be hard. i already have a pit in my stomach just thinking about sending ella, let alone wilson. not that i will miss either of them more, but just when wilson's off to school that will be it. so maybe if i look back on this on his first day i can remember that it's not always easy. and hopefully i'll get to go for a run and take a nice, loooong shower. and even though then and now it will sometimes be hard, i'll remember to enjoy and appreciate the here and now.

ps - it's now 11:17 and anna has been sent to her room for arguing yet again about the jacket issue. heeeeeelp!